9 Breakup Books Every Woman Needs to Read in 2021

If there’s one thing I know for sure as a Conscious Breakup Coach, it’s that going through a breakup makes you become an avid reader (or audiobook listener).

But maybe you don’t know where to start, or what to read next, so I did what any other person would do and I turned to the women who would know best — the ones who’ve been in your shoes and have felt deeply supported from these reads.

So, I asked the women of my Conscious Breakup Collective Facebook Group to share their top picks with you.

Whether you’re working on your abandonment wounds, trauma, self-love, boundaries; recovering from abuse; or attachment wounds, there’s something for you in here.

Please note there are no affiliate links contained in this article nor am I affiliated with any of these books or authors. I am purely using this list to provide resources for you and your healing.

May this list support you in your deepest healing and help you find a book that might just change your life today.

Let’s dive in together.

1.The Journey from Abandonment to Healing By Susan Anderson

Taylor (who’s already read 6 breakup books) highly recommends the Journey from Abandonment to Healing as “the author does a great job defining the 5 stages of grief when it comes to loss of a relationship. It helped me see that the intensity of my emotions was normal and even biological and I wasnt going insane. She provides exercises for each stage of grief. It was seriously profound and helped me so much.”

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2. Whole Again: Healing Your Heart and Rediscovering Your True Self After Toxic Relationships and Emotional Abuse By Jackson Mackenzie

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Jessica, who read Mackenzie’s Psychopath Free just before reading Whole Again, recommends this sequel because “It really helps break apart that protective barrier after a toxic or demanding relationship. Helps you see the wounded self, and process breaking the barrier around it”

As a conscious breakup coach, this is music to my ears as I believe the journey to healing thorough a breakup is to uncover that we are perfect and whole as we are, and it’s from that space that we uncover the conditioning that got us to believe differently.

 
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Photo credit: AMAZON.COM

3.It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Breakup Buddy By Greg Behrendt, Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt

I’m so glad this book was mentioned multiple times as it’s actually the first book I EVER read on relationships when I was going through a really tough breakup at 19 and I absolutely LOVED it. Here’s what Jane from the group has to say about it. “Excellent guidance on recovering over a breakup. It just puts things in a different perspective, so you take your ex down from that pedestal!”

And don’t we all need to take our ex off that pedestal?! This is definitely a “lighter” read and the authors are extremely fun and brutally honest which I found helps you get out of making excuses for your ex from all angles.

4.Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart by Amy Chan

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Photo credit: AMAZON.COM

Camille recommends a couple of books and says Breakup Bootcamp should be on your reading list as:

“It’s a breakup book that really makes you dig deep and think about your own actions. It delves into attachment theories and your past. I’m still reading it as it’s not as easy a read as some others but that’s because it’s so honest and really makes you open your eyes.”

5.You Can Heal Your Heart: Finding Peace After a Breakup, Divorce, or Death By Louise Hay & David Kessler

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If you’re a spiritual gal, then you already know the incredible Louise Hay.

Lucie says" “I have read many break up and relationship books and while they did give me help in understanding unhealthy (and healthy) patterns on both sides of my relationship(s), the one book that really surprised me was You can heal you heart by Louise Hay. It was the first book that clearly focuses on kindness and self love. I feel that had I had better self love for me, my break up very likely would have still happened but it wouldn’t have been so hard (especially on myself).”



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Photo credit: AMAZON.COM

6.Exaholics: Breaking Your Addiction to an Ex Love By Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby LMFT BCC

This book has been recommended by several clients of mine actually; here’s what Laura has to say about it.

“Exaholics was great. It really put a lot of my crazy feelings into perspective and answered the ‘why’s’ of my feelings. It was fantastic with validating what I’ve been experiencing with awesome tips of regaining my power and healing safely.”

7.Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself by by Nedra Glover Tawwab

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If there’s one life lesson we learn during a breakup, it’s that we didn’t realize we didn’t have any boundaries until ALL of them had been broken.

Alex from the group says:

“Not a breakup book [per se], but it CERTAINLY helped me reflect on what boundaries I didn’t acknowledge and/or set in my relationship.”

‘Nuff said.

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Photo credit: AMAZON.COM

8.Self-Love Workbook for Women: Release Self-Doubt, Build Self-Compassion, and Embrace Who You Are by Megan Local, MSW, LCSW

If you’re looking for a resource where you don’t just read, but you actively work on yourself, Rebecca, who contributes a lot to the group suggests this book. Here’s why she recommends this to you:

“And I’m enjoying [Self-Love Workbook for Women] as well. It’s definitely not one that I would do right in the beginning of a break up, when you’re really feeling awful… But a little bit later when you start to climb out of that hole. It’s also a book with lots of exercises and activities to do. It was highly recommended on Amazon, and I have enjoyed it so far.”

I don’t know about you, but I always read through every Amazon review for books.

9.Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help YouFind - and Keep - Love, By Dr. Amir Levine, MD and Rachel Heller, M.A

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Photo credit: AMAZON.COM

And I’m finishing this list with the book I recommend to every single person who’s ever felt like they walk on eggshells in their relationships and attract more commitmentphobic partners.

(Ahem, story of my life.)

This book is why I do what I do, and how I managed to break my unhealthy attachment to dating people who weren’t right for me and also how I attracted my wonderful fiance.

It also comes highly recommended to virtually every person I’ve recommended it to. It’s a light read and you can devour it in a day or weekend.

I hope you found at least one book that speaks to you. Remember that you are not alone right now and there are people going through what you’re going through, and there are incredible resources here to support you.

If you need one-on-one support, please visit me here.

To purchase my Breathe Through Your Breakup: 21-Day Meditation Program, visit here.