You’ve found this article as you’ve realized you’ve literally tried EVERYTHING in the book of getting through your breakup.

• You’ve read every self-help book you can think of

• Have hired a therapist or two (and a coach…or two)

• Talked to all your friends about what’s going on

• Subscribed to every free guide online

• Started dating again with little success

• Have even moved cities or apartments since the split

You’ve doing everything. Guess who this reminds me of? Me.

When I was going through my last breakup, I was a professional matchmaker with a serious need to do my breakup “right.”

After all, how could I be a matchmaker with a failed relationship? These were my thoughts back then.

I did so much to get over my breakup, and a lot of it was helpful, don’t get me wrong.

But there was something I was doing that was also stopped me from truly moving on.

It was simple, really. But it took 18 months to figure it out.

Today, I want to share that with you. Are you ready?

I never just let myself…be.

I never let myself just feel how I felt. Just let whatever came up in that moment to be there.

I was pushing away my thoughts and feelings. This only made them hangout more.

Maybe you’re thinking, “Nancy, this is what I’m doing,” and you might very well be right.

But are you truly? Are you saying to yourself whenever you feel a tough emotion, “it’s okay to feel this way. I am healing.”

Or are you saying, “wow, here we go again. I thought I was over this. WHY am I not over this?”

When we punish ourselves for feeling how we feel, and by expecting time and knowledge to be the way out of our pain, it doesn’t work like that.

You’ve got to be compassionate towards yourself. You’ve got to let yourself feel how you feel.

Yes, reading and talking to loved ones during a breakup is important, but what’s more important than that is the self-love you give yourself when you let yourself feel how you feel.

Next time you feel emotional, don’t rush to go do something.

We live in a world of constant doing. Instead, just be in the moment. Let the emotion pass when you allow it to be present.

Ironically, we get stuck with an emotion when we try and push it away by picking up the phone to call a friend, or by turning on a Netflix show.

We replace processing our emotion, with doing something.

Instead, just welcome your emotion. Even greet it by saying, “sadness is here. Welcome!”

Sounds cheesy, but you’ve got space to give cheesy a try.

I can’t tell you how profoundly differently I feel now that I've learned that allowing my emotions to be. I don’t have to jump to resolving my issues. It’s just an emotion.

If you’re doin too much during your breakup, try this. It might just work for you.

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Want to work with a breakup coach and get more simple tips to support you during your breakup? Book a session with me and let’s see how we can get through your breakup together.