After a seriously rough patch post-breakup, you’re finally out of the darkness.

You’re nervous though, as you want this period to last.

In fact, you never want to go back to those spiralling thoughts that keep you terrified about the future.

You don’t want any more uncontrollable tears streaming down your face as you wait in line at Starbucks, and you certainly could do without the brain fog at work as you think about the ways you could have prevented the breakup.

You’re closer to accepting that this breakup is part of your path, and it’s teaching you things about yourself you’d never learn otherwise. You can see through the fog, and it feels kind of…incredible.

As a breakup coach, it’s my mission to help men and women navigate their breakup, and come out the other side feeling stronger, wiser, and spiritually nourished.

Today, you might be feeling like that rough patch is over for you. But you want to know if you’re really starting to take back your power after a dreadful time in the dark.

I’ve written 4 undeniable signs you’re on your way to owning your power after this breakup. Even if you experience just one of these, you’ve come so far, and have learned so much about yourself. You really need to give yourself a pat on the back.

Alright, let’s dive in.

You’re in control of how you respond to situations

This might be the first time you’re actually aware that there’s a different way to react to the emotions that come up. This is called responding. Not reacting, but responding.

Just saw your ex post on social media with a mystery person? Maybe not too long ago you’d have DMed them and called them out for it. Maybe you’d have picked up the phone and called a friend to vent about it for 2 hours. But lately, it’s not causing such a strong reaction in you. In fact, you see that they’re just doing their thing, and it has nothing to do with you. You might even feel shocked at how you don’t really care that much.

Or maybe you’re aware of how deep your emotions are running, but you’re not going to let those emotions drive your behaviour. You want to choose a different way—a way that actually serves you. So, instead of feeding the emotion and getting caught up in the heavy feelings, you decide to put on a funny show, or sit down to meditate for 15 minutes and let the emotion pass. You trust that this energy will flow right out of you just the same way as it came through.

People are calling out your new energy

Have you noticed in the last week or two just how much people can see your new-found glow? When you feel good on the inside, trust me when I tell you that others can sense it, too.

You don’t need to have a big smile plastered on your face for people to see your beaming energy. (Although if you are noticing that you’re smiling again, this makes me very happy.)

How do you feel lately? Do you feel clearer, and lighter? If so, you are likely shedding old energy (that really felt quite heavy) associated with your last relationship. Many times, when we are going through a tough breakup, it’s like we are carrying an extra 70 pounds in a backpack. Does that resonate?

You’re aware of your boundaries, and the importance of saying “no”

Many times, we learn about our boundaries only after they’ve been crossed. Have you been reflecting on the importance of saying no lately?

Is your ex is still writing you claiming how much they care about you, but they “can’t” be in a relationship right now? Maybe they’re still wanting to hangout (aka sleep with you), and you are used to just saying yes to keep the connection alive. But now, you don’t want to settle for that. You’ve changed your mind, and that’s a beautiful thing.

Now, you want to say no, because saying no means you’re putting yourself first. You’re not giving into what they want, and what you’ll settle for. You’re now saying, “have all of me, or nothing at all, because I’m done doing the in-between dance with you.”

You can still love someone and want the best for them, but you can also have your own boundaries in place so that you’re not getting the short end of the stick anymore.

You’ve let go of people who no longer serve you

Are you finding that along with your ex, you’re reevaluating your friendships, too?

You thought your best friend would reach out to you every day to check in, but they’ve been MIA. You get they are busy, but you also realize your breakup is important, and they’re not exactly there for you.

Maybe you thought your ex’s friends would be on your side, but they’ve completely distanced themselves.

You’re starting to realize that there’s no point in staying in touch with people who don’t have your back when you need it most. You realize that you’re in need of deeper connections, and you’re taking a hard look on what you need. Sometimes, when we get clear on what we want, the people who don’t match that end up leaving on their own. They’re no longer a vibrational match.

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Congratulations on feeling like you’re ready to own your power post-breakup. If you need additional support, reach out to me here to book a session. Let’s get through your breakup together.

Hey there, I’m Nancy! I’m a Conscious Breakup Coach dedicated to giving you conscious breakup advice during, well—one of the hardest times of your life. Let me know if this blog resonated for you by leaving a comment!

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